I read a story online where an individual in high school was falling for a girl who had absolutely no interest in him. She believed the rumors circulating around the school about him, and although the article does not say what they were, I the impression that they were not working in favor. These two individuals had never spoken and he got the impression that she hated him. One afternoon he found a personal ad of hers online so he decided to make a new email address and began to chat with her, telling her nothing but the truth; other than his name of course. He then tried writing her an email from his old address asking if they could meet and get to know each other. She quickly declined saying that she had a boyfriend. What she did not know was that her "boyfriend" was him. Shortly after this happened she asked him online if they could meet sometime. He was extremely nervous but agreed to meet. They arranged a time and place to meet and as he walked toward her table she did not believe and and actually asked him to recite the poem that he had written for her. They actually sat down, shared their first kiss and fell in love, and have been ever since.
This story is consistent with how SIP theory leads to relational growth online. Also, he was honest so when they met there relationship grew even more. If he had lied about himself or said things that were not true in order to impress her the relationship probably would have failed or been "jarred". This also relates to the hyperpersonal model because often online relationships lead to inflated impressions of one another. Their relationship was different because of the honesty and trust that they had developed of one another. They were able to do this because they did not engage in actions such as selective self presentation. This story shows exactly how a relationship can develop online if the participants are honest, which is very difficult to do online.
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2 comments:
It seems like a common thread to these stories is honesty. There's a slim chance two individuals who had been associating online could be disappointed upon meeting face to face if they had been relatively straightforward about themselves (however, this seems to be a rarity). Engaging in little or no selective self-representation is the key.
It would've been interesting if you'd mentioned how the element of time played a role here, since SIP relies heavily on that aspect. Did the fact that they'd been talking for an extended period facilitate their meeting as well?
Interesting post. I wonder how long the online relationship went on before it left virtuality. It would be cool to see how time could affect the outcome of their first meeting. Also, it was nice how you tied in the hyperpersonal model in with the story. It definitely put a twist to the story, since the girl had already made up her mind about this guy based on rumors.
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